By Dr. Kimberly Thomas LCPC
Some Fears You May Face as a College Student:
Going to college is not just about the academics. It is about living in a new world with new people and ultimate responsibilities.
This can be overwhelming and intimidating. However, college is NOT intended to set you up to fail or lose your identity!
Here are some fears you may have on this new journey of your life:
Being accepted for who I really am
This fear is inevitable. It is normal! You are in a new space and place in your life. You have expectations and massive responsibilities, and most of all, you just want to be………. you.
This journey of being accepted comes with the territory but it should not transition into obsessive thoughts about everyone on campus “liking” you or desiring to hang out with you, finding the right people to hang around or even study with. Remember this is a process not an event. If you notice you are obsessing (intense frequent thought patterns) over how many new friends you should have every semester, being publicly noticed and acknowledged by all of your professors, or if you are “good enough” to be the real you, get connected with the university’s counseling center, the university’s department of diversity, equity, and inclusion, and as always, your family and friends at home.
College fees and debt
Applying for financial aid, scholarships, and grants can be overwhelming. Maintaining this funding can also take its toll on you. Most college students experience anxiety and sometimes depression when the tab isn’t paid, and the bills start to come in. It is critical that you stay focused and communicate with your college financial advisor, family, and other key stockholders in your college experience. Know who they are and how to contact them BEFORE you go away to thrive on campus and/or enroll.
Yes, some may have to work harder than others to obtain funding, but you must be open, honest, consistent, proactive, and realistic about the business side of college. If you must work while going to class, prepare your mind, heart and schedule.
Don’t compare yourself to others. When you focus on what others “appear” to have you tend to miss the opportunities waiting for you.
You may worry about picking the wrong major, or changing your major and not knowing if you will have to take additional courses that could delay graduation. You may also be concerned about graduating with a major you are passionate about and not finding a good paying job.
Or – you could be afraid of the most intense feeling, finding a good paying job in your major but not being happy in what you end up doing.
Remember, don’t feed into self- doubt and uncertainty that can begin to disrupt your college life. Reach out immediately if these thoughts become frequent and overwhelming.
Connect with your academic advisor or career counseling center. Be honest and up front with your concerns and questions about career choices and being content. If you doubt your efficiency in your college of study/career choice, find a mentor, campus professional organization, or other support network in the field of study/career and stay connected!!!
Self-awareness tip:
Anxiety is distress or uneasiness of the mind caused by fear of danger or misfortune: a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease.
You must be proactive in addressing your anxiety routinely. It does not go away and stay away. The goal is to have tools in your tool box to use when the anxiety arrives.
If you observe that you have feelings of anxiety (consistently for about two weeks for most days of the week) try the following things for short term relief:
-Get. Out. Of. Bed.– This is the first step to pulling you out of your funk because staying in bed is the first step in keeping you there.
-Go for a walk
-Get some fresh air
-Turn those tunes up so you can sing and dance- Ensure it is positive message music that is upbeat/tempo. Make a playlist of “happy” songs.
-Exercise- Find the campus gym or health club!!! Go out for lunch or coffee with a friend or peer Engage in campus clubs/events/associations
-Keep a journal- This is your writing. Write how you feel, what you feel; what was good about your day; and what could have been better. Write about your accomplishments and your distractions. Most of all be consistent in writing, not just when you feel tense but when you are relaxed and have enjoyable moments.
-Pray and meditate on scripture that deals with worry- “Don’t worry about anything; instead pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.” Phillipians 4:6-7, NLT
If your anxiety is prolonged (consistent for most days for at least 6 months), seek help immediately. This may include but is not limited to:
-Your university’s counseling center
-Private counseling option On campus support group
-Always notify and communicate with your family and close friends about the intensity of your anxiety and how it is impacting your life.